15 Comments on "I play one on the Internet"


  1. Online, you’re very witty, and very interesting and well-informed in serious debate.

    IRL, you seem quiet and the above qualities don’t seem to come across. But I think that’s because I don’t know you well IRL. I’m the same with people I don’t know well.

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  2. Cheerier offline. More incisive online. I suspect that it’s mostly a matter of encountering different things in the two contexts. My view may be distorted by the fact that I’ve known you both online and off for ages, and so my view of you in each context is coloured by what I’ve seen in the other.

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    1. Subject: Yes!
      “Cheerier offline. More incisive online. I suspect that it’s mostly a matter of encountering different things in the two contexts.” I agree.

      -Sumana Harihareswara

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  3. Caveat – all my information is years out of date, and I barely knew you. Also, my perspective is probably very skewed, because I had a big inferiority complex that you were a much better dancer than me and everyone who was “hardcore” CDC hated me because David hated me.

    But I find you much – well, chattier is the wrong word, but much more interested in what I have to say on-line. On-line you are firm, but in a calm, clear and often amusing way. In real life – well, I guess it’s that we only ever met at CDC events where there were other people you knew better there – but I always felt a bit in awe of you, and like I was an 11 year old girl bugging a teenage boy who was cooler than her.

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    1. Subject: O wad some Power the giftie gie us
      Hehe, this is fascinating!

      So, I recall you being around at CDC for one period with DavidI, which I think was when I was an undergrad (94-98), or a bit later; and then another period lot later where you were occasionally at balls and stuff.

      I don’t recall knowing much about what happened with you and DavidI, so I certainly didn’t hate you. I think the general opinion of DavidI at the time was “how does he do that?” (get so many nice young things) not “OMG she’s such a tart” or anything. I think I knew there was some kind of messy breakup, and that’s about it. People who were his close friends may have heard more than that (so I may not have been truly hardcore), but I didn’t.

      I guess when I’ve seen you at CDC stuff later I’ve not quite known whether I should presume on an LJ acquaintance and, you know, talk to you. The 11 year old girl thing is funny because I don’t think of myself as cool at all.

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      1. Subject: Re: O wad some Power the giftie gie us
        I guess when I’ve seen you at CDC stuff later I’ve not quite known whether I should presume on an LJ acquaintance and, you know, talk to you.

        I was probably doing the same thing! I think you’re very cool on-line, (daring to say things to Vicky that incisively was cool, although I suppose you were probably not fettered by a RL friendship that you didn’t want to turn into Doom) and people who can dance well are fundamentally cool, so there you go. For the avoidance of doubt, I would love to get to know you better IRL, although given I am living in Coventry it is highly unlikely to happen! Come to the Round ceilidh on Saturday, I’ll be there…

        [If I start talking about DavidI in detail, I will never stop, and that would not be good on my first day in my new job. If you’re ever interested, feel free to ask me about it.)

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  4. You’re different in RL – you appear to be far less fixated on religion for starters.

    Quite apart from a pet theory that You’re who you are because of who you’re with there’s also the problem of the means of observation when making an assessment (conscious or otherwise) of an individual. Human beings are far more complex than any narrow description can convey, whether it be on the internet, in print or even the shallow impressions we make on those around us as we go about our business.

    To turn the question around, is it possible to know someone as a whole person without having to actually live with them?

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    1. Hello, anon. Who’s that?

      I’m not sure who I’m with when I’m writing stuff on here. I suppose I’ve made a (very small) name for myself doing the religion stuff so I’m playing to my audience a bit, but it’s also an outlet for the sort of discussion I enjoy but don’t really have IRL anymore (as my Christian friends have given up on reconverting me 🙂

      I think even living with someone doesn’t mean you’ll know them as a whole person: my wife doesn’t know what I’m like at work, for example.

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  5. Subject: Mmmmm.
    Knowing you through work (and just to back up what I said to you after lunch), I only read the tip of your LJ today. Of course, I do get to see the whiplash of your wit in the BugDB.

    I think your opinions are there for the asking in person, but are more clearly browsable by the great unwashed in your LJ. So, face-to-face, you seem more private, maybe even reserved, until someone says something that interests you.

    People who say your aren’t incisive in person clearly don’t work with you. Now, I do want to hear you sing, and you should definitely come to the Round Ceilidh on Saturday, if you want to laugh at me with guitar… All the cool kids will be there… 😉

    Adam

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